What is your clutter index?

I guess we need a new definition to gauge the progress and development of the society. It should depend on the amount of non-biodegradable waste we can generate in our day-to-day life. I would always be amazed by the by-products of grocery shopping in the US. A trip to Kroger’s or Jungle Jim’s would generate a lot of new plastic bags – in Midwest the baggers never asked paper or plastic – they just assumed plastic, unless you were buying wine or spirits! Then there were other items – the plastic can of milk and orange juice (sometimes a tetra pack) and the plastic bottles or cans of several carbonated beverages, yoghurt, the Styrofoam trays of meat and deli meat wrappers, the plastic wrappers of cookies, the cardboard containers of graham crackers and cereal and plastic bags of chips, Doritos, bagels etc. Add to that the flimsy plastic bags of green vegetables or fruit. After studying my erratic cooking patterns, I switched to using the frozen vegetables. The non-biodegradable index of garbage remained the same but the biodegradable surely reduced after the switch!

A trip to Food World recently reminded me of this garbage-business. Since parents are away, it is up to me to buy something, cook and feed myself. If you are my kind of shopper – no haggling, assume the quality is good, pay and get out of the shop – then probably Food World is the only place. So, off I go to Food World, armed with crisp notes from an ATM. I get the usual stuff and head home. Then the scrutiny starts – there are plastic bags of neatly wrapped tomatoes, some fresh cut ocra (lady fingers, bhindi) and fenugreek (?) (methi), a bag of onions, yoghurt can (dahi – mom’s not home, so need to buy yoghurt), two plastic bags containing fresh (but dead) Godrej chicken, a separate plastic bag for bread and some biscuits, cream biscuits (sandwich cookies) and light snack.

One trip to Food World and 213 less rupees in the pocket, I have amassed almost equivalent non-biodegradable waste I would after a trip to Kroger’s. I already start feeling guilty. Images of the flooded river Mithi haunt me.

The next week, I am a bit smarter and decide to buy the veggies in the conventional market. I know my father carries a cloth bag. I search for the bag at all conceivable places in home. I find the bag neatly folded along with several plastic bags in a kitchen cabinet. So, armed with the cloth bag, I go to the conventional market. I walk to the first shop, glance at a few veggies and start ordering – 250 gm Tomatoes, 500 gm onions, a bunch of spinach and 500 gm of peapods. After weighing everything, the vendoress pulled a plastic bag for all the veggies. I stopped her and handed over the cloth bag that was hidden in my pocket. With a couldn’t care less for it expression she took the bag and started putting the vegetables inside it. Now I feel all middle-aged eyes in the market on me: “Look, he did not even ask for the price!” “Oh my, that’s not 500 gm, and this guy – why is he shopping any way?” “Cloth bag? Cloth bag? – where did he come from?” But I brave it all, pay up and walk away self satisfied about my endeavor.

After a small trip to the Food World for other items, I return home. Enthusiastically I start cleaning the spinach and retrieving peas from the peapods. Soon, my garbage bag fills with all this biodegradable waste. But the joy is not long lasting. Other items have generated the equivalent amount of the non-biodegradable waste! Now, I face a predicament – here I am, shopping consciously and avoiding plastic bags, only to realize that the major component of it is still non-biodegradable! Seriously, what do I do with all those plastic bags now or after a few thousand years?!

Marathi Vyaparee (businessmen)

Maharashtrians like to ruminate – marathi loka dhandyaat mage kaa? (Why do we lack the business acumen? Or, why are we not great business men?) And mind you, this is Marathi mentality we are talking here. So we are not looking at building business empires directly, but may be sustaining a shop or making profits in a business run with help of 10-15 odd people. I think a large part of that is attitude. Don’t get me wrong – there are a few Marathi folks who are doing well in business, but overall, a Marathi man will prefer to work for someone else rather than take pains of working for himself. (The usage of male gender is for simplicity, do not want to go writing Marathi man or woman every where.) There is another facet to the attitude – how you treat your customer. As acclaimed writer PL Deshpande in his essay, on people from Mumbai, Pune and Nagpur points out, we consider the customer as the least important thing in the store.

So, what motivated this post? Well a difference in attitude by two different businessmen. At work, the quality of food is given utmost importance and any caterer is at risk of losing or termination of contract if people think they deserve better food. Now, it is a normal practice to not-like the cafeteria food. But there is really not-likeable and then there is okay-I-can’t-tolerate-this-food. And that’s what happened here and the old caterer was let go. After the new one came in, I started noticing the differences distinctly…

In the old style, the person who used to take money would stand there with a distinct expression that was something like – ale giLaayalaa! – A derogatory Marathi phrase that means these people do not deserve the food (and especially not at such low cost). The plates would be often times not dried, and it was left up to the eater to dry the plate….

Then there was the dilemma of empty containers that I never understood. Yes, when you keep a serving-bowl full of crunchy papads, people do take one or two extra. But this caterer had mastered the art of not letting people do that. Every time, there would be enough quantity in the serving bowl for only two people. So, I would always hesitate – if I take the papad, the next five people in the queue won’t have any…all right, skip the papad. It was later that I realized, if I had taken one piece, he would have added a couple more pieces from the other container that was deftly hidden from public view. But the ploy works – for those papad aficionados would satisfy themselves with not more than two pieces of papad otherwise risked making the serving bowl empty! Walha – we have saved some papads!

As you proceeded in the line, a person in caterer’s employ would serve the buffet items. He would serve enough to make it look enough, but not enough to satiate you by quantity. And since he would either start working on the next person in line or hide behind the counter, there was no way of asking for more.

By the time, you would have plate full of food, and walking towards a table, you would have the feeling of ale giLaayalaa all over again!

Also, even though vegetables are costly, doDhee-bhopaLaa (a vegetable in zucchini family, do not remember the English name) twice a week is not very appetizing for many (me included)! So isn’t the half-cooked rice and dal (split lentil curry) that would characteristically taste the same every day!

A couple of visits later to Yo! China and Veg Tadka restaurants, I took the easy way out! Now, my friend is on the food-committee, so pestering and whining has added advantage! At last, the caterer got the boot!

In came a Punjabi caterer the next day and we have been eating the food without complaints for more than past three weeks. Granted the honeymoon period is not over yet, but there are some differences to note. First of all, he shows the courtesy to treat his customers - well like customers! The person who takes your money has a God given gift of smiley face! Your first contact on the other side of the buffet does not make you feel guilty about eating! If by chance the plate is still dripping with water, he wipes it for you and mumbles an apology. The food items are much more tasty and choice of vegetables better. What I also liked is if the serving bowl is empty, it is because the food item is really over, not because the caterer is trying to save money. And the caterer feels genuinely bad about it – “aaj aap thoDa late aye sir” (we were almost winding down sir; it is tad late for you today) – he would say apologetically. And if you bump into the owner, he asks if everything is fine and if I have eaten properly giving it a motherly touch!

Now you tell me – which caterer would you prefer?

The Man Who Walked on MG Road

It was a lazy Saturday morning. My normal plans for weekend included running a few errands and then cozily watch some TV lying down on the sofa. I far from achieved anything that I planned, but the weekend was really good! While I was busy doing nothing, the phone rang. “Where are you? And why didn’t you call?” – demanded the voice from the other side of the line. There is a disadvantage to being the youngest among all cousins. They speak authoritatively and never treat you as if you were a grown up! I had forgotten that my cousin was going to come down. So, I changed all my plans (!) and went to visit her. After all the small-talk, big-talk and catching up, she mentioned her childhood friend is coming in the evening. Apparently, my cousin and this friend used to baby sit me in summer vacations when I was a toddler. But I couldn’t care less. After all, how much did it matter to me now?

Eventually the friend came in and we again sat for a casual chat - (re) introductions, exchanging pleasantries, small-talk, big-talk etc. After a while, the friend mentions: “ha kitee vegaLaa disato ataa!” (He looks so different now!) – pointing at me. My cousin agreed – “ho – amachya peksha ha sagaLyaat jasta badalalaa.” (yes, he is the one who changed so much.) My usual shrug, nod and smile technique did not work as the ladies persisted. This was the observation from a 45 something about a 30 something – in past 30 odd years she did not expect me to change?! And she was seeing me after so many years!

Cousin: We used to take you around for walks.
Friend: Yes, you were such a cute kid. (Oh my god – please, what did I do to deserve this assault? – I kept thinking.)

Both the ladies continued talking like lost in past. All of a sudden, my cousin turned around, looked me in the eyes and said, “That’s where you learned to walk! You started walking on MG Road!”

Now it was my time to be startled. I discovered a piece of my childhood that seemed surreal.

What's up Morarji?

Came across this article on Rediff. Still trying to figure out if Morarji was trying the snub the Soviets or was just acting like an old arrogant buffoon that he really was...

Missed Call

With a Caller ID available on the cell phones, the missed calls have become a language of there own…and since voicemail comes with a cost attached to it, it is almost unheard of. However, there is a breed of people who take offence at you not answering the phone. So, if they call, and you do not answer, they call again and again and again…. There was this newly married girl who used to sit about three cubicles away from me. She had her cell-phone ring set to the highest volume, phone inside the purse and purse inside the drawer. Invariably, she would forget to carry her phone to the cafeteria. Her devoted hubby would always call her during lunch time. As the luck would have it, her time to go for lunch coincided with me returning from lunch. I had to listen to the persistent Bollywood tunes daily – irritated me to the extent that I was ready to break open her drawer and purse and talk to her husband. My snide remarks eventually paid off and she started carrying the phone with her.

I was guilty of the same offence on Friday. Since it was rather nippy (by Pune standards), I was wearing a light spring jacket. The phone was in the jacket. I came to work, left the jacket on the chair and went for some breakfast and then for a casual chat with the team. After I returned to my desk, there was a weird buzz-hum sound coming from my chair. Yes, someone had called, and it was - kid-you-not - the 17th missed call in barely 30 minutes. Caller – I bow to thy calling (im)patience!

Subcontinental Drift?

This article in BW talks about how western 20 somethings are taking a chance by working in India for Indian call centers for some time. Apart from providing a more colloquial interface to customers in Europe, US many say, it also becomes a value-add on the resume for the candidates, opportunities of career advancement that are otherwise not available in their native land and a chance to see India.

Would have liked to see what the scenario is in other areas such as IT, BioTech and KPO – the other western looking export oriented industries. Sometime back, many big names in IT were wooing returning expats. But would a westerner like to come here – not as a client – stay for a year and do some serious programming/designing/testing for us?

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Did Star Trek shape the modern world?

This chain of thought was started while flipping channels on the TV when I saw the good old Captain Jean Luc Picard somewhere. I used to watch the original Star Trek, mostly because there was nothing much to watch at that time. I can hardly claim I understood everything at that time, but I was old enough to understand the possibilities of space travel (technology surely has not kept up with fiction!). Later I was introduced to the Star Trek TNG – the Next Generation – and started liking the new Captain, the new Number 1, not to mention the counselor, the tactical officer (before the Klingon took over) and the Doctor! The amount of philosophy fascinated me. The later versions of Star Trek Voyager and Star Trek Enterprise were also fascinating and philosophical. (Do they officially declare you a loser if you start finding philosophy in science fiction?)

A while back, while listening to the Morning Edition on NPR, they played a report on how Star Trek may have helped shape the modern world. The Star Trek started when the cold war was at its height. The Star Trek though propagated a view of a united world exploring limitless opportunities. The crew was all-inclusive with representation from Asia (Mr. Sulu) and the African-American community (The lady always had trouble hearing messages – was it the communication system or her ears? We will never know!). For Americans, who feared nuclear holocaust and cold war, this was a welcome respite. Moreover, while doing this, it sort-of maintained the American supremacy.

So, there you have it! In a fictitious future, the American way had succeeded, the world united and man going where no one had gone before! The commentator went on saying the African-American lady on the ship deck became a representation of American society that was still recovering from the ugly clutches of segregation. And the modern technology designs of many gadgets can find their roots in the Star Trek! Yes, some of the cell phones indeed look like Captain Kirk’s communicator – the ingenious designs of communicators using match boxes though were good fun while playing!

The TNG was a step ahead. The hunger was conquered and machines could make warm milk with a dash of nutmeg to your liking! Not only the Earth, but also the Galaxies and extra-terrestrial intelligent beings were at peace (were we still fighting Klingons then?). There was one episode, where some cryogenically sealed ‘humans’ from 20th century are somehow found by Captain Picard’s crew. After explaining them where they currently were – the investor among them is happy, because by now his shares of GE would have split many times to make him very rich! Captain Picard curtly explains him that there are no GE shares anymore because the man has no longer a need for money!

That is a bold concept! No one knows where we will be in the 2400s or what kind of society will it be. Although, if you watch Star Trek with a different perspective, is it not espousing the military? There is no place for civilian drama in Star Trek. Some sort of a military infrastructure controls everything. Star Trek does not fantasize about any kind of social behavior of the ‘new’ planet earth or other planets harboring intelligent life. And wherever it does, it only shows misery or vagabonds taken to ideologies that won’t work! How will the brave captains otherwise save lesser mortals?

Now, does that sound familiar? How will the brave captains in US save lesser mortals in Iraq? How will the brave captains in US save Venezuela from Chavez? How will the companies producing weapons save India from Pakistan and vice versa? Without a Patriot Act, how will America save itself? Does Star Trek, not very strangely, advocate something like this? A society - of the military, for the military and by the military…. Is Gene Roddenberry’s creation based on Dick Cheney-Donald Rumsfeld style of thinking? Or am I reading too much into this? After all, NPR was talking only of all representative American science fiction that liked peace and technology!

Two CIIs

When we talk of CII – it conjures, the image of an institution that is working hard to ensure the growth of Indian Industry and making sure the industries’ presence is felt world wide and with respect. But, to our west, on the other side of the border, CII means Council for Islamic Ideology. In a pseudo-democratic set up of Pakistan, organizations like CII have the power to review laws. The reason of this review is that the laws passed should not be repugnant to Islam. As if the Executive, the Legislature, the Judiciary and the Military were not sufficient in Pakistan, there is a fifth branch of the government!

Traffic Congestion

Stockholm is experimenting with charging drivers entering in to city center to reduce the number of vehicles and avoid traffic congestion. The traffic scenario in Pune is getting worse day by day and if Pune has to keep up, it needs to take some drastic steps early on. MG Road has already implemented the Fussgaengerzone. How about closing more roads to private vehicles and really supporting the PMT/PCMT for once? There is a lesson or two we can learn from other congested cities in the world - but if we are ready to keep our eyes and ears open and give up the coveted vehicle if need be...

University of Michigan's ban on Coca Cola Products

The news item related to University of Michigan's ban on Coca Cola products is commendable. Over the past few years, UMich has succeeded in providing a thought leadership and has made good name. So, something like this coming from UMich is surely a shot in the arm for many. Not to mention, they have also joined Rutgers and New York University and Coca Cola could be set back by about $1.4 Million.

After all, the agony of many living in perpetual water shortage and pollution because of the Coke plant has not gone unnoticed. Also the concerns raised about the pesticide content have never been answered satisfactorily. Contrary to what Amir Khan may claim, I would be still skeptical about the contents in a coke bottle. And if Coca Cola had actually done something to alleviate the fears and come clean about the content rather than spend lots of money on Amir Khan, it would have become worth drinking "sir ooThakey." In the Car Talk radio program, Ray and Tom Magliozzi (pronounced: maa lee yazzee) indeed offered the advice that a can of coke can be used to clean the rust on car batteries. Now, that's the stuff we drink! And don't even get me started on pH levels of diet coke.

An article in Indian Express, I believe reprinted from Newsweek(?), talks of Corporate Social Responsibility - and how Coke is not standing up to it. I am sure, many companies won't. But consumers can teach them a lesson...may be it is time we all stop drinking coke "sir ooThakey".